RUMBLE AT THE ROCK 2022

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Oct
30

 

OPENING

The opening video and the Metallica song “The GOD That Failed” fade out as we cut to a live overhead shot of Alcatraz Island.It is 8pm local time and the sky has just gone black, and we see the Golden Gate bridge illuminated off in the distance as its clear we are getting this overhead shot via helicopter as it circles the island.

As the helicopter continues to circle we begin to see various parts of the island and prison.

  • The medical building which will be hosting tonight’s Infirmary Match
  • The Chapel where we will see a man crucified tonight
  • The power house and infamous water tower
  • The Prison Yard where a scheduled HOW vs. PWA Match is to take place
  • The main building where the rest of the matches including our LSD and World Championship Matches will take place

Finally, the helicopter completes its circle of the island, and we see the Wardens house where the High Octane crew is set up including Hall of Famer Joe Hoffman who is set to once again call a PPV from this historic setting.

We cut to a cameraman with boots on the ground as he captures the helicopter turn hard right and begins to make its way back to the mainland.

As the lights of the helicopter grow small we fade out from outside of the prison and now fade inside where Joe Hoffman is standing by.

The feed cuts quickly inside the warden’s office as we see Joe Hoffman sitting in front of several monitors. There is an empty seat next to him….which does not go unnoticed as Joe looks at the chair and gives a little smirk before turning his full attention to the hard camera in front of him.

Joe Hoffman:  Welcome to everyone tuning in on High Octane Television and PWA TV as we here at High Octane Wrestling are ready to present to you our annual event live here at Alcatraz Prison……RUMBLE AT THE ROCK!!!!!

The feed shifts to graphic highlighting the top three matches of the night as we focus in on the Chapel, LSD and World Championship Matches.

Joe Hoffman: The top two championships are on the line tonight and we will see the career of one Scott Woodson come to a close as he takes on Scott Stevens in a match that Scottywood has made his own over the years…..a Crucifixion match inside the Prison Chapel. BUT before we get to those three matches we have three more matches that are all set in familiar settings if you have watched HOW over the years.

The screen updates to another graphic highlighting the Infirmary, Prison Yard and Gen Pop match featuring one Clay Byrd of the Highwaymen.

Joe Hoffman: EVERYONE has their favorite match settings here at Alcatraz and one would think that the favorites to win tonight’s matches would be the vets of this show. Experience only matters more when it comes to War Games than it does when having a match here inside Alcatraz Prison.

The graphic on the screen no pivots to inside the main building of the prison as we are taken inside the belly of the prison as we get to the General Population of the prison. We see a High Octane ring set up on the cold concrete and three levels of cells surround the ring.

The camera pans up via crane to show that all the cells are fill of fans.

Joe Hoffman: That is right folks…you are seeing that correctly. Another annual tradition here at HOW as those are fans that not only volunteered to be locked inside those cells…they joined various local contests just with the HOPE of winning the right to be locked into an Alcatraz Prison cell for over three hours tonight. Amazing and something I would NEVER do.

The camera continues to pan in a circle as the fans bang on the cell doors and bars as they see the camera pass by them.

Joe Hoffman: Well folks enough talking. I see our Hall of Fame Senior Referee Matt Boettcher is in the ring and it is time for our first match of the evening……..Frank Dylan James taking on the Highwaymen’s Clay Byrd. Two monsters physically about to kick off this show…….ALL the money has been on Byrd for this match…….time to find out.

CLAY BYRD VS. FRANK DYLAN JAMES

The camera cuts to the ring and we see Boettcher turned and staring towards the door where the wrestlers will be making their way out.

The fans in the cells are now rabid as they know the action is about to kick off and several fans have mirrors in their hands as they try to get a glimpse of the entrances of the first wrestlers of the night.

Joe Hoffman: Well any second now……

Nothing.

Several more seconds go by and there is no entrance music played for either man.

Joe Hoffman: Folks I know most already have pegged this as an easy win for the Monster from Plainview…..but are we even getting a match here? What is going on?

The feed and cameras remain focused on the steel door waiting for one of the two men to make their way out for our first match of the evening.

Joe Hoffman: Folks I apologize. This is clearly NOT how we wanted to kick off tonight’s show. Most wrestlers will tell you that if they are not in the Main Event they would prefer to open the show as its imperative that the show starts off with a bang……not a whimper…..and I am afraid that we…..

BANG

Joe stops in midsentence as the steel door flies open and we don’t see one wrestler making his way out…..we see BOTH.

Joe Hoffman: HERE WE GO!!!!!

The cameraman jumps out of the way as Clay Byrd makes his way thru the door he just kicked open. He is smiling from ear to ear and we see why as he is literally DRAGGING FDJ thru the door.

Joe Hoffman: OH my…….Frank is already a bloody mess and it appears this match is over long before it ever was meant to officially start.

Byrd, without any strain, continues to drag the 295lb man towards the ring…..with one hand mind you.

As he passes each cell the bloodthirsty High Octane fans scream out in approval at what they are seeing.

A bloody body before even the first bell.

Joe Hoffman: Byrd taking his time here folks and clearly is taking this all in. He knows he has this match won and its clear to me that he is making a statement to the whole darn locker room.

FRANK!!!

FRANK!!!

Byrd stops in his tracks as a fan continues to scream out his opponents name.

Clay turns towards the cell and sees that it is coming from a cell on the ground floor…..directly across from him.

Byrd drops Frank to the concrete and he begins walking towards the cell and as he does the cell goes quiet.

A cameraman follows closely behind and the light from the camera illuminates just who is in the cell.

Joe Hoffman: OH geez….as most can guess…the cells on the floor level were snatched up by some corporate deals struck by THE BOARD and this particular cell seems to be filled with a couple employees…….

Byrd begins to laugh as he realizes just what company is being represented here in the cell.

Joe Hoffman: Quick shout out to Applebee’s for providing the catering for the wrestlers in the back and a quick prayer for those two Applebee’s employees in that cell that have snatched the attention of Byrd.

Clay walks right up to the cell and one of the employees quickly falls backwards towards the cell wall…….the other one….does not budge and stares intently at Byrd.

Joe Hoffman: OH boy…..this pleasantly plump Applebee’s employee with a patchy beard is clearly not thinking straight. NOT AT ALL.

The employee begins berating Byrd and Clay takes it all in with a smile.

BANG

BANG

Without breaking his smile, Byrd snatches the main by his hair and bounces the mans head off the steel bars of the cell not once….but twice.

The man falls to the floor of the cell and begins bleeding profusely completely unconscious.

Byrd kneels down and watches the man bleed before whispering…

“ You called down the thunder. Well, now you got it”

The Monster from Plainview turns back towards his opponent, who is still not moving, and snatches his leg and restarts dragging the man towards the ring.

Joe Hoffman: Once again I would like to apologize to Applebee’s….they got the best straws in the business…no doubt. For those asking….yes EVERY fan in attendance had to sign a waiver to be locked inside those cells and High Octane Wrestling is not liable for any harm that may come from them…either from themselves, the environment, or High Octane wrestlers and staff……..and yes I was told to say that.

Back ringside and FINALLY we see Byrd roll his opponent into the ring.

Byrd motions for Boettcher to get out of his way as he drags FDJ to the center of the ring and drops the man.

The fans in the cells begin chanting…

“BYRD”

“BYRD”

“BYRD”

Clay takes it all in as he pounds his chest and then makes the universal motion that he wants a title around his waist.

Joe Hoffman: Well we ALL knew that this match was a foregone conclusion after FDJ basically went AWOL from all the promotion leading up to the event. Word is that he lost his smile as soon as the video of Byrd cutting a scathing verbal beat down of the man was made public earlier this week.

Back in the ring and Boettcher is yelling at Byrd that he CANNOT start the match as the man is knocked out and unable to defend himself.

It finally sinks in what Boettcher is saying and Byrd turns ALL his attention towards Boettcher and stares a hole thru the man demanding that he signal for the bell.

But Boettcher refuses.

Byrd grabs the Hall of Fame referee by the shirt and literally picks him up off the ground and DEMANDS he start the match.

Boettcher will not budge however.

Joe Hoffman: Boettcher is not going to budge here and Byrd has to know that. There is only one man—-

“RING THE BELL MATTHEW…..RING IT NOW”

Byrd drops Boettcher to the canvas and looks up at where the voice came from. The very top row of cells.

A solitary spotlight quickly illuminates the man…

Joe Hoffman: LEE BEST!!!! LEE BEST!!!!!!????

Byrd looks puzzled as he looks up at the GOD of HOW.

Behind him the bell is rung as Boettcher quickly signals for the bell.

Lee motions for Byrd to turn around and cover the man.

Byrd does not move however. He continues to look up at Lee puzzled.

Lee Best: Looks like somebody just walked over your grave.

Lee smirks as if he was back somewhere in Arizona…

Lee Best: Turn around. Pin that waste of fucking time and resources and move literally one point out of the Number One spot……you KNOW what that means.

The look of realization comes over Byrd and he quickly spins around and covers FDJ.

Boettcher drops down for the most academic of pinfalls in Rumble at the Rock history….

1…

2…

3…

DING DING DING

Joe Hoffman: There you go folks….Clay Byrd with the pinfall victory and is now literally one point away from the number one spot in HOW.

Byrd quickly jumps back up to his feet and looks back up.

But there is only darkness.

No spotlight.

No GOD.

Boettcher tries to raise the arm of Byrd but he pushes him away as he continues to look up as we cut elsewhere leaving Byrd trying to make sense of what just happened.

ICONIC

CONOR FUSE VS. STRONK

Back post ICONIC advertisement, we cut back once again to Joe.

Joe Hoffman: We’ve got a hell of a contest coming up, the infirmary match. Conor Fuse seeks revenge against Stronk Godson, who recently turned his back on Bobbinette Carey. It was Stronk’s crew behind the Bobbie attempted murder, after a long time of trying to figure it out. Now Conor faces Stronk and honestly… this has to be both men’s biggest tests in some time.

The scene switched to the infirmary where a wide, muscular Stronk Godson can barely fit in the picture frame as he enters.

Joe Hoffman: The match will start when Conor Fuse arrives and the winner has to drag their opponent out of the room, which likely means one of these two will be rendered unconscious. Or worse.

Stronk stands in the middle of the infirmary. He cracks his head, he cracks his neck. He looks around when-

BANG!

The front doors shoot open as Conor Fuse rides into the infirmary standing on top of a hospital bed.

Conor Fuse: Hellllooooooo goombaaa!

Stronk readies but the bed is coming in at a high speed and he’s not fast enough to get out of the way. The hospital bed nails Stronk in the leg and as Conor leaps off and throws Godson down with a head scissor takedown. Fuse pops to his feet and crushes numerous, hard superkicks under the power lifter’s jaw.

DING DING

Fuse grabs Godson and runs him straight into the cement wall. Conor yells and runs Godson into the other side of the brick wall.

He’s not done. With anger in his eyes, Conor wraps both hands around Godson’s skull and begins to hammer it off the cement brick over and over again.

Joe Hoffman: I don’t think there will be a lot of wrestling moves in this one. High flying on Conor’s end is out and Stronk is all power to begin with.

The Ultimate Gamer runs Stronk’s head into the wall so many times there’s a solid indent due to the crumbling stone. Godson is covered in broken pieces of the wall and looks to be out of it as Fuse takes three steps back and screams once again.

Conor Fuse: Welcome to Alcatraz, dipshit.

Conor races towards Godson but out of nowhere the muscular mass rises and catches Fuse in the air.

WHAM!

Joe Hoffman: What a spinebuster slam by Stronk!

It’s clear Godson needs a moment to himself as he wobbles around on his feet. Conor rolls onto his side and sees Godson pick up one of the other hospital beds.

Stronk throws the ENTIRE structure at Conor’s head.

SWOOOSH!

CRASH!

With the force Godson throws the bed, the metal pieces fold in half when it misses Conor and crashes into the wall! Fuse’s eyes are wide, as if realizing he’s very lucky that missed him or else he may have been decapitated.

Conor rolls to a knee while an angry Stronk charges. Fuse ducks a right knee smash and slides to the side before popping to his feet and landing a left forearm to the side of Godson’s temple.

It barely phases The Board member so Conor tries another one.

Nothing.

A third blow, with Fuse winding up this time.

Stronk shakes his head no.

Stronk Godson: STRONK FIND PUNY GAMING ARM OF CONOR FUNNY.

The physical freak snatches Fuse by the shoulder and hurls him halfway across the room where Conor lands on a hospital bed! Godson power walks over and grabs an IV nearby. He weaves the cord around Fuse’s neck in an attempt to choke the gamer out!

Joe Hoffman: This does not look good!

Conor gasps for air but it’s no use. Godson has the cord wrapped around Conor’s neck a couple of times and squeezes it from both ends. Fuse’s face begins to turn blue!

Stronk Godson: STRONK KILL WEAK VIRGIN GAMER.

And Godson won’t stop there, either. After strangling Conor, Godson finds the end of the tube and the needle attached…

Joe Hoffman: I think Stronk is going to put that IV in Conor!

Stronk laughs as he moves the needle closer to Conor’s right arm while The Video Game Kid tries to break free from the choke hold but he’s almost knocked out! The Vintage has limited oxygen supply left.

Stronk Godson: FILLED WITH STRONKUMMS. YOU DIE.

Conor’s life is on the ropes. Stronk almost has the IV at his arm… plus Conor starts to pass out!

Godson laughs again. He realizes Conor IS out so he takes the needle away from Fuse’s arm, only to hold it in the air and then jam it back down into the spot, for added dramatic effect. As Godson goes to plunge the needle deep into Conor’s arm…

The former World Champion gets a second wind! He moves and Stronk puts the needle into his own thigh!

The power lifter screams in agony as Fuse scrambles on the floor to untangle himself from the IV cord.

Conor Fuse: [gasping for air] Let… me… help… you…

Finally, Fuse gets on his feet and boots the needle further into Godson’s leg! The giant cries out while Joe Hoffman tries not to puke given the announcer’s fear of needles.

Whatever substance is in the IV starts draining itself into Godson’s leg. Stronk removes the needle but only after the IV has emptied. Conor continues to catch his breath as his face starts to turn back to his pasty pale complexion.

Godson looks down at his leg, which is slightly bleeding from being stabbed but nevertheless he’s ready to go. His eyes narrow.

Stronk Godson: WON’T KEEP STRONK DOWN. STRONK KILL CONOR FUSE.

Stronk realizes Conor is still struggling for air. Godson’s able to work through the pain and stand.

Then Stronk immediately falls over on one leg!

Godson looks like he doesn’t understand. He’s not in that much pain so he tries to stand again.

Same thing. He tips over!

Now Conor Fuse rises and points to the IV.

Conor Fuse: Read the label, asshole.

Godson tries to but he can’t comprehend it.

Conor Fuse: I forgot, you’re likely illiterate.

The Ultimate Gamer shakes his head.

Conor Fuse: It reads Novocain.

Instead of hammering his opponent, Godson starts punching his own leg in the hopes to get some of the feeling back. Meanwhile, Conor grins from ear to ear as he walks over to Godson but keeps out of arm’s length.

Conor Fuse: By the way, I broke in here last night and set up a few surprises.

Fuse walks over to a cabinet and opens it. He pulls out a medicine ball and rifles it at Godson’s face.

PING!

It hits Stronk square in the mouth!

Next Conor takes elastic workout bands and slingshots them at Godson. These don’t hurt but it just further frustrates the power lifter who wants to do nothing more than stand the hell up but can’t.

Conor finds a whey protein container. He opens it, goes back to where Godson is stuck on the floor and pours it over Stronk before booting the former HOTv Champion in the side of the head. Fuse takes hold of Godson and with all of his might, Conor drags his opponent to his feet. He connects with a running bulldog using the wall to run up, push off and drive Stronk’s face into the tile floor!

…The now broken tile floor.

Conor Fuse: Gonna end you here, bud…

But Stronk headbutts Conor in the nose! Blood bursts from Fuse and it looks like Godson has his feet back from under him. He grabs The Power-Up King with both hands in a choke hold, lifts him up…

CRACK!

And drives Conor through one of the hospital beds!

Joe Hoffman: I think Conor is KO’ed!

The gamer is out and Stronk looks to end it. Godson walks over to the large table in the back…

And rips out the defibrillator.

Joe Hoffman: No, don’t do this!

Godson goes to where his opponent is in a heap and sets the defibrillator down, plugging it in. He charges the battery and picks up the electro pads. He looks down to the spot Conor Fuse lays…

He doesn’t see anyone!

Joe Hoffman: From above!

Fuse has scaled the ceiling and is hanging from one of the old water pipes. He comes crashing down on Stronk with a splash but Stronk drops the defibrillator and catches Fuse instead!

Joe Hoffman: Stronk’s going to run Conor into the brick wall!

No!

Conor wiggles free and escapes. Fuse with a couple roundhouse kicks to Stronk knocks him back. Then Fuse grabs the electrode pads on the defibrillator.

Conor Fuse: Clear?

He pauses.

Conor Fuse: Wayyyyyy too cliche. Fuck that.

Instead, Fuse finds the medicine ball and hits Stronk in the head with it again. Then, with all of his might, The Vintage lifts the defibrillator.

And throws it at Godson’s head!

CRUNCH!!

Joe Hoffman: The defibrillator’s dented! Heavily!!

Godson is staggered. Conor goes back to the cabinet he had opened prior.

A 20lb dumbbell.

Fuse screams as he races towards Godson.

Conor Fuse: FOR BOBBIE!

THUMP.

Godson falls to a knee.

Conor takes a deep breath and looks his opponent over. He takes another run at him.

Conor Fuse: FOR ALCATRAZ!!

THUMP!

An even harder shot against Stronk’s cranium. Now Godson is on all fours.

The gamer’s demeanor changes. Suddenly he looks extremely pissed off… almost possessed. He starts mumbling about “calamity” as he hurls the 20lb dumbbell to the side and walks back to the cabinet.

Fuse reveals a 50lb barbell weight.

He moves rather methodically towards the power lifter.

Joe Hoffman: Ummm… Conor???

The former World Champion stands over his opponent and raises the 50lb weight.

Conor Fuse: FOR………..ME!!!!!!

CRAAAACK!!!

He drills the weight into Godson’s skull as blood goes flying, even covering one of the nearby cameras!

To the horror of the crowd watching, Conor isn’t done. He props a broken down Stronk Godson up against the wall in a seated position.

And rests the 50lb weight OVER STRONK’S HEAD AND CHEST.

CRACK!!!!!!!

HEAD STOMP INTO THE WEIGHT!!!

The weight falls to the left, Stronk Godson falls to the right. Godson’s face goes white. He starts to shake, it looks like he’s having a seizure. And then…

Nothing.

Fuse stoically walks over and with all of his might, he drags Stronk Godson out of the room and past the line. It takes the Toronto native a while, but Stronk is DOA.

DING DING DING

The gamer grins sadistically as he’s announced the winner. Stronk Godson shows a minor sign of life as EMTs come running. Fuse remains motionless, simply staring at the destruction he caused.

Joe Hoffman: And Conor Fuse seeks redemption for himself in Alcatraz AND for Bobbinette Carey!

It takes four EMTs to lift Stronk up when…

THUMP!

He immediately collapses back to the floor!

As if there was NO life in him whatsoever.

One of the EMTs scream for the defibrillator. Another quickly goes into applying CPR on Godson. And on cue, seeing the events escalate even more…

Conor Fuse comes crashing back down to reality. The Vintage has a horrific look on his face when he witnesses Stronk isn’t moving.

Or breathing.

Joe Hoffman: Oh my God this is serious…

One EMT continues to perform CPR, the other is bringing the defibrillator over and a third one evaluates the situation.

EMT: He’s not breathing!!

It’s officially confirmed.

Conor looks like he’s going to puke as they hook up the defibrillator.

EMT: CLEAR.

ZAP.

Nothing.

EMT: CLEAR.

ZAP.

Nothing.

Joe Hoffman: Stronk… those blows by Conor… and with all the weight lifting and pressure Stronk puts on his heart to begin with…

EMT: CLEAR.

ZAP.

Nothing.

The EMTs continue to work away as Conor just watches in the corner of the infirmary. Stronk’s revival is attempted five more times until another doctor appears and checks Godson’s pulse. Everyone converses other than the gamer…

And it is declared Stronk Godson is dead.

Joe Hoffman stays on radio silence as the EMTs use one of the untouched infirmary beds to lift Stronk onto. They eventually cover Godson with a white sheet.

Conor Fuse sulks in the corner and continues to watch in horror.

One of the EMTs walks over to Conor. It seems like the EMT is trying to talk the gamer down but tensions are high throughout the infirmary.

The other EMTs begin to wheel Godson out of the room.

…when at the last second, Godson’s right hand twitches before being wheeled off-screen.

Rumble at the Rock goes elsewhere.

24 HOUR RULE

We cut back to the Warden’s Office as Joe sets the stage for the next part of the show….

Joe Hoffman: You might have noticed as we looked around Alcatraz earlier tonight that the prison yard is NOT being prepped for a match. There’s a reason for that, and we’re going to take a look at why!

We cut to footage recorded earlier today from A-Block, where a fight has broken out…a fight between Xander Azula and Kyle McRae, much to the surprise and delight of fans that made their way to the section this far from the start of the show.

The two men are trading blows, clearly not wanting to wait for the Prison Yard match to get their hands on each other…but word has clearly made it up to Lee Best, and sure enough the Elite Protection Unit is on the case as they come swarming into the area.

Some of the EPU pull the two men apart, and others keep the crowd back as McRae and Azula are forcibly removed from the area as we cut to Joe Hoffman.

Joe Hoffman: Well folks, there’s the footage…and I’ve been informed that Xander and Kyle were moved from A-Block into solitary confinement, where they’re spending a full 24 hours due to their actions. The impression I’m getting is Lee Best is NOT pleased about this act of defiance, to the point where the Prison Yard match is off the table for tonight…but these two WILL compete in HOFC…..we just will have to find out the when.

We cut away as another advertisement is played on HOTv and PWA:TV

HALL OF FAME

Hall of Fame announcement coming on December 4th

SCOTT STEVENS VS. SCOTTYWOOD

Joe Hoffman: Big news there folks as a Hall of Fame announcement is coming and on Lee’s birthday? Color me 97red intrigued. Anyway, moving on folks…..we are now ready for our third match of the night… one that we can all but assume will be the most violent match of the night. The Chapel will host the crucifixion match between The Hardcore Artist, Scottywood as he takes on The #97Red Prophet, Scott Stevens and these two men are no stranger to violence. Since coming into HOW in 2012, Scott Stevens and Scottywood have been at each other’s throats. War Games, Barbed Wire Matches, Street Fights and others to beating the holy heck out of one another to attacking each other’s family members these two absolutely HATE one another.

Joe nods as the camera zooms in.

Joe Hoffman: Tonight, it all comes to an end. A decade’s long rivalry ends with someone crucified in the chapel……

Frankie: Hi Joe!

Frankie comes barging into the Warden’s office and Joe shakes his head.

Joe Hoffman: Why did I know I was not going to get to call this match alone?

Frankie: Cause you knew I wouldn’t miss Scottywood’s final match here in HOW.

Joe Hoffman: Yeah… just like his “retirement” crucifixion match against Scott Stevens back in 2019?

Frankie: I have no idea what you are talking about Joe. All I know is that Scotty no longer has a contract with HOW after this match.

The camera cuts to the chapel where we see Scottywood standing next to the wooden cross that earlier in the week he wrapped in barbed wire. Dressed in his New York Rangers jersey and holding his trademark barbed wire hockey stick, he also has a microphone in his hand.

Scottywood: I’ve been doing this all for some twenty-three years now… which is crazy considering how old I was when I started. This has been like two-thirds of my life. Don’t do the math there and break the immersion, but this has been so important to me. Ups and downs, highs and lows… wrestling has always been a constant. I ran XWF / NGW / HATE for some eight years and I thought that was always gonna be my legacy. I took so much pride in what I built there. Then I joined HOW in 2008. I built a whole new legacy here, a better legacy. Fourteen years with Lee Best and HOW. I’ve won just about every title here, including a World title that I saved from the clutches of Stevens. I was inducted into the Hall of Fame and have made life long friends.

Scotty turns towards the camera.

Scottywood: Speaking of friends, Bobbinette Carey. One of my first friends I made here in HOW and hanging out with you over the years has been one of the many things that has made HOW so much fun. So know even though I may be done in HOW after this match… I’ll still be around, cause none of you fuckers are getting rid of me that easily. I know you won’t see this until after your match with Jass-ace Davidcreeperson, cause I know you’d get all emotional… and I need you to embrace the HATE to murder that cockstain and save my LSD Title.

Scotty emphasizes the importance to Bobbinette.

Scottywood: So enough of the rambling… I know in this sport people seem to just fade away, disappear into the ether, never to be seen again. So I wanted to make a point to thank you all for making HOW everything that it has been over the last fourteen years. Making it the constant that it has always been for me. Now it’s time for me to do the thing I have constantly done for the last fourteen years. Drink a beer and put on the craziest, most violent match of the night.

Reaching down into a cooler by the wooden cross, Scotty pulls out a 16oz can of Revolution Brewing’s Anti-Hero and cracks it open, spraying beer all over the cross.

Scottywood: To everyone in HOW, prost and cheers! Now bring that fucker Stevens out here so I can nail his ass to this cross!

Scotty downs the beer as he tosses the can off to the side and the doors to the chapel open. A red light shines brightly through the opening as smoke pours out before we see Scott Stevens emerge with his arms out and head looking up to the sky.

Joe Hoffman: Well that was an emotional speech by Scottywood before what has already been an emotional feud leading to his final match.

Frankie: Scotty has bled #97Red before it was ever cool. He’s been the heart and soul of HOW for well over a decade. If he is done with HOW after tonight, then this is a sad and historic day for the fed.

Stevens slowly walks into the chapel and hands the official the Cross of Best who places it near the wooden cross. Scottywood is less than thrilled with Stevens’s antics as we can see him shaking his head as he decides he isn’t gonna let Steven continue with his bullshit and charges him with his hockey stick, drilling him straight in the stomach as Boettcher says he hasn’t rung the bell yet.

Scottywood: This isn’t a match Matt, it’s a fucking fight and I don’t give a fuck about a bell. So if wanna make it to the main event, ring the fucking bell if you must and get the fuck out of here until I crucify this fuck!

Boettecher throws his hands up as he calls for the bell and heads out through the smoke and #97Red light as Stevens is heard chuckling from the cheap shot.

Scottywood: What’s so funny?

Scotty asks as he raises Stevens’ head with his hockey stick.

Scott Stevens: You talk too much.

Scotty mouths the words, “really” before he slams the barbed wire stick across the back of Stevens who drops down to one knee. Scotty rips the black t-shirt with a #97Red logo on the front off Stevens, exposing the blood that is already starting to trickle down his back. He smiles as he takes the hockey stick and slams it as hard as he can across the back of Stevens, cracking it as Stevens crashes down to the floor.

Joe Hoffman: That is certainly at least two minutes for slashing…

Frankie: I think it’s an automatic four Joe, he drew blood.

Discarding the broken hockey stick Scotty grabs Stevens by the hair and pulls him to his feet as he leads him down the aisle of pews towards the cross. Near the front, Scotty throws Stevens into one of the pews which he crashes though and to the floor. Walking over to the cross, Scotty pulls a large bag out from behind it and tosses it on the floor.

Joe Hoffman: We know that Scotty has been here all week long preparing for this match. Who knows what kinds of surprises he has hidden around this building.

Frankie: We know there is a dumpster outside that Scott Stevens is going to be burned in. I can’t wait for that Joe!

Reaching into the bag, Scotty pulls out a hockey skate as he drags his thumb across his throat.

Frankie: Yes! He’s gonna break Happy GIlmore’s record and stab a man with a hockey skate!

Walking over to Stevens who has pulled himself up onto all fours as Scotty goes to grab him again by the hair, but Stevens spins around and drills Scotty in the left knee with a board from the broken pew. Scotty stumbles as Stevens swings again and connects with the knee as Scotty turns away from Stevens who is now able to get back to his feet with the board still in hand. He slams the board across the back of Scotty as stumbles forward in an effort to create space. But Stevens closes the gap and goes to turn Scotty around, but The Hardcore Artist spins around by himself and blasts Stevens in the forehead with the skate blade, sending Stevens crumpling down to the floor.

Joe Hoffman: Jesus Christ! Scotty with the skate blade to the head of Scott Stevens! What the f… jeez!

Frankie: Stevens is gonna be lucky if he has half a brain left after that. I think that skate blade cut straight through his skull!

Scotty tosses the skate to the floor as he pulls Stevens up to his feet to reveal that the #97Red Prophet’s face is covered in #97Red blood. But suddenly we see Stevens just smile back at Scotty.

Scott Stevens: I’m the Demi-God of HOW Scotty. Personally chosen by HIM to lead the House of Best. You think that little skate is going to stop me?

A sadistic grin forms over the face of Stevens

Scott Stevens: You can’t defeat #97Red Scotty!

Stevens informs his rival as he touches the wound with his hand and licks the blood from it.

Scottywood: I am #97Red you fucking fake ass idol!

Scotty yells as the Texan spits a mouthful of blood into the face of The Hardcore Artist.

Frankie: Cheap shot!

Stevens bullrushes his rival and begins to exchange a barrage of punches and we see blood flying off the head of Stevens with each shot. Scotty tries to cover up and get some blows in, but It’s Stevens though who gains control as he hits an elbow to the throat of Scotty and connects with a quick neckbreaker onto the wooden floor of the chapel.

Joe Hoffman: Didn’t think we’d see many wrestling moves here in this match, but Stevens is reminding us that this is still somewhat a wrestling match.

Frankie: He’s reminding us that he’s not tough enough to beat Scotty in a hardcore match.

Joe Hoffman: Didn’t Stevens defeat your father in this very match a few years ago?

Frankie: I don’t recall this.

Stevens now looks at the bag near the cross and opens it up as he spots something that makes him smile as he pulls out a cheese grater.

Joe Hoffman: Hockey skates and a cheese grater… interesting collection of items in that bag.

Scott Stevens: You wanna bitch about your elbow that I hurt? Well here is something to bitch about!

Stevens grabs Scotty’s left arm and takes the cheese grater to the left elbow, shredding the skin off it and sending blood pouring down his arm as Scotty winces in pain. Grabbing Scotty by his goatee now, Stevens goes to take the cheese grater to the skull of The Hardcore Artist, but suddenly Scotty takes his right arm and delivers a low blow shot to Stevens.

Joe Hoffman: Low blow by Scotty!

Frankie: Surprised that it worked since I heard Stevens has no balls.

Stevens seems like he is about to fall over… but his face goes from that of fake pain to a large smile as he shakes his head at Scotty.

Scott Stevens: Always wear a cup when playing hockey Scotty!

The Hardcore Artist is in shock as Stevens takes the cheese grater and rakes it across the forehead of Scotty who lets out a yell as he clutches his head and collapses to the floor.

Frankie: That’s gotta be illegal Joe! You can’t wear a cup in a wrestling match!

Joe Hoffman: Smart move by Stevens as he now has control of this bloodfest of a match.

Stevens now pulls Scotty up to his face, revealing a Hardcore Artist with a crimson mask of his own as Stevens slaps Scotty across the face in a showing of utter disrespect.

Scott Stevens: Time for you to be sacrificed to The God of HOW.

But Scotty just starts to laugh as now he spits blood back at Stevens.

Scottywood: I’m the fucking Anti-Christ of HOW you stuipd son of a bitch! So you can…

But Scotty doesn’t finish his sentence as he lunges forward and headbutt Stevens, sending him stumbling back towards the cross. Scotty wipes the blood from his face and smears it across his chest like warpaint. The Hardcore Artist rushes at his rival and sends the Texan to the floor with a massive clothesline that turns Stevens inside out. Scotty makes his way over to Stevens and delivers a massive punt to the side of the 97 Red Pope’s face. Scotty reaches down and grabs Stevens by the face and pulls something out of his pocket.

Scottywood: You see this Stevens?

Scotty shows the electronic device to Stevens.

Scottywood: This is my final sendoff. I have this place rigged to explode with enough TNT that you can see it from space!

Joe Hoffman: WHAT THE!!!!!

Frankie: Dang. He blew the surprise.

Joe Hoffman: SURPRISE?!?!?!?!? HE’S TRYING TO KILL A MAN!

Frankie: All legal inside of HOW.

Scotty places the detonator back in his pocket.

Scottywood: Before the grand finale we still have a lot more fun to do.

Scotty spikes Stevens face into the ground as he makes his way to the cross and grabs the hammer.

Scottywood: We really need to hammer out a few things before I finish you for good.

Scotty tells Stevens before taking the hammer and targeting the right knee of the Texan.

CLANG!

CLANG!

CLANG!

Metal striking metal as Scottywood is trying to destroy that protective knee brace of Stevens. Scotty continues to hammer away until he hears a crack. A sadistic smile forms over Scotty’s face as he begins to take off the knee brace and toss it aside.

Scottywood: It’s hammer time Stevens!

Scotty begins to lay waste to the knee of Scott Stevens and the Texan has no choice , but to yell out in pain.

Frankie: Scotty is too legit to quit Joe.

Hoffman shakes his head as the two watch as Scottywood continues to viciously assault Scott Stevens’ knee.

Scottywood: HE can’t save you now!

Scotty shouts at his rival as he raises the hammer, but the Texan stuns Scotty with an up kick.

Frankie: COME ON DAD! HOW COULD YOU GET CAUGHT SO EASILY?!?!?!?

Scotty regains his composure and marches forward to Stevens who is trying to get the feeling back into his leg. As Scotty gets near, the Demi-God of HOW quickly grabs his rival and slams him onto the floor with a vicious spinebuster.

Joe Hoffman: DOUBLE S SPINEBUSTER!

Stevens rolls on top of Scotty and begins to deliver a flurry of right hands before bringing down a barrage of hammer fists.

Joe Hoffman: Stevens now delivering a series of hammer fists to the face of Scottywood.

Stevens slowly raises both arms to deliver a final blow, but Scotty grabs the hammer that laid next to him and hits Stevens square in the face with it.

Frankie: Stevens couldn’t touch that, eh Joe?

Scotty tosses the hammer to the floor and charges his rival and carries him all the way to a concrete pillar and begins to bounce his head off of the pillar. Scotty kicks Stevens in the gut to double him over and hooks him for a DDT.

Joe Hoffman: SDT coming up?

Scotty has other ideas as he turns back around and begins to drive Stevens’ head over and over again into the concrete pillar. Scotty steps forward a little bit before driving the Texan’s head into the concrete floor.

Frankie: SDT!

Scotty sits up and sees Stevens laying next to him and grabs a shard of glass of glass and pushes Stevens onto his back and sits on his chest.

Scottywood: You want to worship someone Stevens.

Scotty asks before driving the shard into the center of his rival’s chest and starts to carve a masterpiece.

Joe Hoffman: I think I’m going to be sick.

Scotty admires his masterpiece as he tosses the shard of glass behind him and stand up to reveal a massive Anarchy symbol on the chest of the Texan.

Scottywood: Time to take out the trash.

Frankie: BURN STEVENS! BURN!

Frankie chants over and over as he watches his father grab Stevens by the hair and pull him up and head towards a window. Once by the window, Scotty gets him in position to throw Stevens.

Scottywood: Tell Kostoff hi.

Scotty tells Stevens before chunking him through the window of the chapel.

Joe Hoffman: This is horrific.

Frankie: This is greatness.

Scottywood Rot in hell Stevens.

Scottywood says to himself as he turns away from the window, but stops when he doesn’t hear anything. Scotty goes back to the window and as the camera shows his back he is seen falling back from it as we see Stevens pulling himself up through the window. Stevens perches himself on the window and launches himself through the air as Scotty starts to stand.

Joe Hoffman: Toxic Sting from the window!

Frankie: He should be on fire!

Stevens waits for Scotty to get to all fours and the Texan rushes at Scotty and delivers a massive knee to the side of his head.

Joe Hoffman: Better than the Best running knee.

Stevens collapses in pain, but drags himself over Scotty. Once there, he musters enough strength to stand and pull Scottywood up to deliver a series of V-Trigger knees to Scotty’s face. Stevens pulls Scotty up and places him between his legs.

Joe Hoffman: Stevens may be looking to finish it here with the Gamechanger.

Stevens reaches down, but Scotty still has some left in the tank and delivers a low blow before grabbing Stevens by the throat and slams him down.

Frankie: YEAH! THAT’S RIGHT JOE! SCOTTY JUST SLAMMED STEVENS’ ASS! SLAMMED HIS ASS!

Both men lay next to each other on the concrete floor exhausted and hurt.

Joe Hoffman: Both individuals are giving it their all and the only way to win is to nail your opponent to a wooden cross. The officials cannot stop this.

Frankie: Scotty is going to make sure Stevens is crucified before blowing him up tonight.

Scotty gets to his feet and begins to pull Stevens up and places the Demi-God of HOW across his shoulders before making his way over to the wooden cross.

Joe Hoffman: Scotty is looking to end it here and now.

Scotty stands in front of the cross and looks to deliver the final blow.

Frankie: Game Misconduct coming up Joe!

Scotty lifts Stevens up and rotates him over, but Stevens was playing opossum as he counters with a cutter.

Joe Hoffman: OH MY! STEVENS COUNTERS THE GAME MISCONDUCT WITH A TOXIC STING!

Frankie: DANG IT!

Stevens takes a moment to collect himself before picking up Scotty and slamming him onto the wooden cross. Stevens grabs the black velvet bag and opens it up to produce the steel spikes and an extra hammer. Stevens grabs a metal spike and positions it on Scotty’s left wrist and begins to hammer it in.

Joe Hoffman: I don’t think I can watch.

Frankie: Grow some balls Joe.

As the Texan finishes nailing down the left arm he’s taken back by Scottywood laughing hysterically.

Joe Hoffman: I think Stevens has broken Scottywood.

Frankie: Only his body is broken Joe, not his spirit.

Stevens turns to get another spike, but the momentary pause allowed the Hardcore Artist to grab one and drive it into Stevens’s face and through both cheeks.

Frankie: That….was….a….thing of beauty.

The sound of Hoffman throwing up is heard as Stevens smashes the hammer into Scotty’s face. The Demi-God of HOW pulls the metal spike out of his cheeks and positions it on his right wrist and begins to hammer it into the bone. Stevens grabs another spike and begins to hammer it through Scotty’s feet as Scotty continues to laugh hysterically as Boettcher calls for the match to end and declares Stevens the victor.

DING DING DING

Joe Hoffman: What a brutal and grotesque match! What a bittersweet end to the rivalry that is Scottywood and Scott Stevens.

Frankie: My father gave it his all. That’s all that matters.

Scottywood: You think this is over Stevens? Not by a fucking longshot! I’ll be back! I always come back!

Scotty informs Stevens and the Texan makes his way over to Scotty and grabs the Cross of Best and drives it into the chest of Scottywood.

Scott Stevens: No. You won’t.

Stevens replies as he shoves the cross deeper into Scotty’s chest before picking his pockets.

Frankie: Thief!

Boettcher checks on Scotty, but Stevens orders him to leave and the official does as he is told and the two exit the building. Once outside Stevens holds something up for the world to see.

Joe Hoffman: Is that?

Frankie: He wouldn’t!

Stevens presses the button on the detonator and after a few moments the chapel explodes into a fiery inferno…much like the explosion we saw at Dead or Alive featuring these same two men.

Frankie: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

A sick and sadistic smile forms over his face as he tosses the detonator to the ground and snaps his fingers for Boettcher to hand him something. Stevens slowly places his 97 Red glasses over his face.

Scott Stevens: In the name of the Father, the Sons, and the HOly FC. Praise be to Lee mother fucking Best!

Stevens shouts as he watches the chapel burn with delight as we cut away.

THE GOD THAT FAILED

We cut to the Prison Yard where the helicopter we saw earlier in the evening has returned and we see it is being loaded with the body of STRONK with HOW Medics in tow.

Standing next to the helicopter, unfazed by the spinning blades of the machine, is none other than Lee Best.

He looks on as a concerned Father would as the medics strap STRONK’s body in.

There is a white sheet over the man and the medics look despondent.

A crewman motions for Lee to move out of the way but the GOD of HOW will have none of it.

He stands unmoving as the helicopter slowly ascends into the air and turns towards San Francisco.

The cameras remain focused on Lee as he never takes his eyes off the helicopter.

He is still there watching the lights as we cut back inside the prison.

BOBBINETTE CAREY VS. JACE PARKER DAVIDSON

We shift back inside of the prison itself to the Warden’s office. Joe Hoffman is still seated safely inside of the office away from all of the carnage that has happened tonight and going to continue at any moment. Joe takes a deep breath and is ready to call the next match.

Joe Hoffman: That was a tough thing to watch there. Lee just looked WRECKED knowing that he has lost his STRONK. But as Lee has often said over the last 20 years….the show MUST go on and up next we have a grudge match to end all grudge matches. The LSD Championship belt will be on the line as HOW Hall of Famer Bobbinette Carey will challenge fellow Hall of Famer and the current LSD Champion in Jace Parker Davidson. I have a feeling this one won’t be for those with a weak stomach. Let’s send it down to the kitchen where this match is going to take place.

The camera shifts from the Warden’s office down to the kitchen of Alcatraz prison. Referee Joel Hortega can be seen standing inside of the kitchen     alongside Bryan McVay at the moment. There is no ring or a mat to protect from the cold concrete flood. Just the kitchen here in Alcatraz. The camera takes a moment to scan the cell’s that are full of fans but mixed in with the rabid HOW audience are other wrestlers from different companies. Clearly, certain people in the business have come to see Jace Parker Davidson get his comeuppance here tonight for all he’s done.

Bryan McVay: Our next match is a Kitchen & Chow Hall match and it’s for the HOW LSD Championship!

Suddenly the sound of “ENEMY (ARCANE)” by Anna blast throughout the prison through the set up sound equipment. The fans in the cells cheer wildly as The Queen of Epicness Bobbinette Carey slowly makes her way towards the kitchen. Bobbinette is wearing a black bodysuit with matching wrestling boots.

Bryan McVay: Introducing first the challenger. From Parma Heights, Ohio, weighing in tonight at 215lbs. She is a HOW Hall of Famer, here is the Queen of Epicness BOBBINETTE! CAREY!

Joe Hoffman: Bobbinette Carey has gone through things no human being should have to suffer. Just because she saw the potential of a relationship with STRONK Godson she had her life put in Jeopardy and her loft in Chicago burnt to the ground. Tonight she looks to take her pound of flesh and maybe more from the culprit Jace Parker Davidson.

Carey circles the kitchen area slowly as she looks over everything while remembering the last time she was in this very position. Carey has a look of determination on her face and stands on one side of the kitchen as her music dies down.

Joe Hoffman: Someone like Jace would say that Bobbinette Carey belongs in the kitchen. However, I feel like tonight he’s going to get even thinking something like that about the only female Hall of Famer in HOW history.

Bryan McVay: And her opponent…

The fans inside of the cells all begin to boo loudly as the sound of “KINGDOM” by Jaxson Gamble begins to play from the set up sound equipment. Slowly but surely Jace Parker Davidson makes his way towards the kitchen. Jace doesn’t have his wrestling gear on for this match. He’s wearing a pair of blue jeans with his wrestling boots on. He has a black t-shirt that reads “GOOD RIDDANCE SCOTTYWOOD” across the front with his LSD Championship belt strapped around his waist. Both of his hands are taped up along with his wrists.

Bryan McVay: From Miami, Florida by way of New York City and now residing in Denver, Colorado…

Joe Hoffman: What a jackass.

Bryan McVay: Weighing in tonight at 253lbs. He is a HOW Hall of Famer and the current HOW LSD Champion. Here is The King of Everything JACE! PARKER! DAVIDSON!

The fans in the cells begin to boo even louder than before as Jace takes his sweet time getting to the kitchen. He soaks in the hatred from the people in the cells and completely ignores the fact that Bobbinette is chomping at the bit to get her hands on him. Jace does his best Miss America impression by going over to each cell on that floor and taunting the fans like they are getting to see a once in a lifetime athlete.

Joe Hoffman: After going from kicking Bobbinette in her private parts and making a mockery of abortion rights. Then tossing her off of the U.S.S. Octane, to the attempted murder, and being responsible for burning down her loft. You’d think this man would at least face the music like a professional. Instead he’s out here taking a victory lap before the match has even begun.

Bobbinette has had enough of the bullshit. She grabs a hold of a frying pan inside of the kitchen then starts marching her way out of the kitchen. Jace is standing in the middle of all the cells with his arms spread wide soaking in the hatred from the fans in attendance. Suddenly the boos turn into cheers as Jace begins to grin ear to ear thinking the fans have decided to suddenly accept him.

Joe Hoffman: This is going to hurt.

Bobbinette comes up from behind the LSD Champion before rearing back and swinging upwards to clock Jace with the frying pan to the back of the head. Jace face plants down to the concrete floor as Hortega just stands there and shrugs his shoulders. Hortega points off into the distance as a bell is heard ringing.

DING DING

Joe Hoffman: There will be no disqualifications in this match so what Carey just did is perfectly legal and well deserved in my opinion. The LSD Championship match is underway and I am happy to report that Bobbinette has the advantage.

Jace remains on the floor holding the back of his head in pain as Bobbinette tosses the frying pan aside. Carey leans down and grabs a hold of Jace and pulls him back up to his feet. Carey marches Jace along into the kitchen and promptly proceeds to chuck him as hard as she possibly can into the large refrigerator inside of the kitchen. Jace hits the refrigerator with a sickening thud before falling back down to the hard floor. Carey steps away from Jace and the refrigerator and waits for him to get back up to his feet. Jace touches the back of the head to see if he is bleeding as he uses the handle on the refrigerator to pull him back to a vertical base. Carey charges then hits Jace with a big spear that sends him crashing hard back into the refrigerator.

Joe Hoffman: Bobbinette Carey just tried to put Jace through that refrigerator with that spear. I know it’s early in this match but if she can shake off the damage done to herself with that move then she just might be able to make quick work of her tormentor here tonight.

Jace hits the floor along with Carey who begins to crawl on the floor while trying to clear her head from the spare into the refrigerator. Carey pulls herself back up to her feet using one of the counters instead of going for the cover. Bobbinette turns her attention away from Jace and begins to search for something else to use to inflict damage to the LSD Champion. Bobbinette shuffles through various cooking items. Carey ultimately finds a rolling pin then begins to stalk back over towards Jace who has managed to pull himself up to one knee. Bobbinette grabs hold of Jace with her free hand and pulls him back to his feet but Jace was playing possum. He quickly turns around and blasts Carey in the face with the LSD Championship belt. Both Carey and Jace hit the floor as the rolling pin went flying off to the other end of the kitchen.

Joe Hoffman: Got to believe that was a bit of a desperation move by Jace there. With Bobbinette looking for a weapon to use he managed to unhook the LSD Championship from around his waist and nail her with a shot to the head. Both of them are down but Jace buys himself some precious time to recover from Carey’s onslaught.

Hortega reaches down and picks up the LSD Championship belt from off of the floor. Hortega carries the belt over towards where the cells are and raises it into the air to remind everyone that the title is on the line. Both Bobbinette and Jace pull themselves back up to their feet and then charge forward towards each other like wild animals. Each of them begin to trade off stiff punches back and forth. Carey begins to get a slight advantage but Jace stops her momentum with a knee to the midsection. Carey doubles over in pain as Jace grabs a hold of her by the arm. Jace yanks her around with off of his strength then levels her with a ripcord clothesline that sends her crashing down to the concrete. Jace turns around looking for the LSD Championship belt but finds Hortega heading back into the kitchen holding the title.

Joe Hoffman: Hortega was doing his job by presenting the Championship belt to the fans to show that this is a title match. I have a feeling Jace is going to take exception to the fact that his weapon of choice here so far wasn’t there where he left it.

Just like Hoffman predicted, Jace gets into it with Hortega. Jace snatches the LSD Championship belt away from the referee then sticks his index finger into his face. Hortega slaps Jace’s finger away and points behind Jace. Quickly Jace snaps around to hit Carey with the LSD Championship belt again but Carey is quick to counter and kicks Jace between the legs like her name was Justin Tucker.

Joe Hoffman: Bobbinette Carey went low and that must feel sweet after what happened aboard the U.S.S. Octane!

Jace drops the LSD Championship belt and falls to his knees in pain. Carey takes a few steps back then charges forward and hits Jace with a running knee to the face that flattens him. Carey turns around then grabs a hold of Jace by the hair and begins to pull him off of the floor. Bobbinette shoves Jace’s head between her legs. Bobbinette grasps Jace around the waist and tries to lift him up for a powerbomb but Jace kicks his legs and gets a low center of gravity. Jace steadies himself up the floor then counters with a big back body drop that sends Carey crashing spine first down to the concrete. Carey arches her back and screams in pain as Jace begins looking for something to use. Jace manages to find a fork before he turns back towards Bobbinette. Jace stalks his way back over to his opponent then pulls her up to a seat position on the floor.

Joe Hoffman: I’ve got a bad feeling about what he’s thinking about doing next.

Jace grips the fork in his free hand and begins to jab Carey in the forehead with it repeatedly as the fans boo loudly. Bobbinette continues to cry out in pain as Jace keeps relentlessly stabbing her in the forehead with the fork. Blood begins to pour from an open wound on her forehead and run down her face. Satisfied, Jace tosses the fork away before backing up a bit. Jace gets a running start then levels Carey with a V trigger knee to the back of the head. Carey slumps over to the floor in a bloody heap. Jace rolls her onto the back then hooks the leg and makes the cover as Hortega slides in for the count.

Joel Hortega: UNO

KICKOUT BY CAREY!

Joe Hoffman: Bobbinette just kicked out after a one count. Jace just tried to murder her using a fork but Bobbinette Carey still has a ton of fight left in here tonight.

Jace gets up to his feet then argues with Hortega saying that he needs to count faster. Hortega holds up a single finger to tell Jace it was only a one count. Frustrated, Jace turns around and begins laying in stomps to Carey. Jace leans down and grabs a hold of Carey by her blood soaked hair before pulling her up to her feet. Jace begins to walk Carey out towards the Chow Hall but Carey grabs Jace by the waist then drops him on the back of his head with a belly to back suplex to the concrete. Jace rolls around the floor in pain as the fans start to cheer Carey on.

Joe Hoffman: Jace seems to want to take the fight out of the kitchen but Bobbinette managed to drop him on the back of his head with that belly to back suplex. Looks like the tide is once again turning in his match.

Carey uses the counter to pull herself to her feet and stumbles around the kitchen. Jace fights his way back up to his feet and grabs chase to Carey. Jace grabs a hold of her by the arm and spins her around. Carey unleashes a right hand that staggers Jace but only for a moment. Jace steps forward and hits Carey with a superkick to the face that sends her tumbling towards the other side of the kitchen. Jace once again chases after Carey who is only still on her feet because she’s leaned forward against the counter. Jace grabs a hold of Bobbinette by the arm but Carey turns around and completely smashes a glass coffee pot over his head. The pot shatters into pieces as Jace falls to the concrete.

Joe Hoffman: Carey just swung for the fences and destroyed that coffee pot against the head of the LSD Champion!

The concrete floor is littered with broken glass as Carey takes a moment to try and wipe the blood from her eyes. With a sneer Carey turns to look down at Jace as she walks over towards him. Carey grabs a hold of Jace by the head and pulls him up to his feet. Carey grabs a front face lock then lifts Jace into the air and spikes him with a DDT onto the broken glass on the concrete floor.

Joe Hoffman: OH MY GOD! Bobbinette Carey just spiked DDT’d the Champion head first into broken glass and concrete. There are shards of glass stuck in the top of Jace’s head and shards of glass stuck in the back of Bobbinette.

The fans go wild over the brutal move as both Carey and Jace remain on the floor. Jace begins bleeding from the top of his skull and from right over his eyebrow thanks to the shot with the coffee pot and the subsequent DDT. Carey manages to pull her back off of the concrete with a bit of a groan. She hooks the leg and makes the cover on Jace as Hortega slides in for the count.

Joel Hortega: UNO

Joel Hortega: DOS

Joel Hortega: TR–

KICKOUT BY JACE!

Joe Hoffman: Two and a half count there for Bobbinette Carey before Jace managed to shoot his shoulder up off of the concrete. Call me crazy but is Bobbinette smiling? Could she be happy that Jace kicked out so that she gets to punish him some more?

Carey rolls over off of Jace who begins slowly but surely crawling his way to the Chow Hall. Carey pulls herself up to her feet then begins to stalk after Jace. Carey leans down then grabs a hold of Jace and pulls him back up to his feet. Carey walks Jace over to one of the long tables in the Chow Hall and slams him down onto it head first. Jace slumps down against the table as Carey once again takes a moment to wipe the blood out of her eyes. Carey grabs Jace and tosses him up onto the table. Carey climbs on top of the table along with Jace. Carey grabs a hold of Jace but before he can capitalize Jace rakes her in the eyes. Jace plants a boot to the midsection of Carey then shoves her head between his legs. Jace flips forward and then drives down onto the table with a Canadian Destroyer. The fans gasp at the sickening thud that Carey lands with. Jace lays an arm over Carey to make the cover as Hortega begins to make the count by slapping his hand on the table.

Joel Hortega: UNO

Joel Hortega: DOS

KICKOUT BY CAREY!

Joe Hoffman: Sickening Canadian Destroyer on top of the table but Carey managed to get her shoulder up before the three. You have to believe that if a leg was hooked and a proper cover was made then that might have been it. The loss of blood here in this match is going to pay a crucial role in deciding who wins this match.

Slowly Jace pulls himself up to his feet then walks along the long table. Carey begins to fight her way up to her hands and knees as Jace measures her up. Jace charges forward looking to hit her with Bend The Knee but Carey rolls out of the way just in time. Jace’s foot crashes down onto the table as Carey pulls herself to her feet. Carey shoves Jace backwards causing him to stagger. Carey rushes forward then connects with Royal Pain. She got the lariat flush and it sent Jace stumbling off of the table and down to the floor.

Joe Hoffman: Bobbinette Carey is like a woman possessed here tonight. No matter what Jace throws at her, she just keeps fighting back here. What is she going to do now?

Carey takes a moment to catch her breath as Jace remains on the concrete. Carey once again charges forward along the table then leaps off of it and connects with the Epic Ending down onto Jace. Carey hooks the leg and makes the cover on Jace as Hortega slides in for the count.

Joel Hortega: UNO

Joel Hortega: DOS

Joel Hortega: TRES!

NO!!!! THE PIN ATTEMPT IS BROKEN UP!!!

Joe Hoffman: What the hell?! Who is that individual?!

Someone has escaped one of the cells and managed to break out the cover at the last split second. The fans still in the cells begin to boo as the cameras zoom on to get a better look at the mystery person.

Joe Hoffman: I know who that is! That’s Cass Baumer! That’s Jace’s alleged adopted daughter! What in the hell is she doing here in Alcatraz?!

Carey pulls herself up to a seated position as Cass measures her up. Cass gets a running start then hits Carey with a stiff running penalty kick to the face that she calls the Bleeding Edge. Carey is laid out on the concrete as Cass turns around and begins to check on Jace. Members of the EPU rush into the Chow Hall and apprehend Cass. They drag her away from the action as Jace slowly tries to get himself back into this match.

Joe Hoffman: Looks like even when Jace is moments away from getting his just desserts that he still has an ace up his sleeve. Bobbinette Carey should be the HOW LSD Champion right now!

Jace grabs a hold of the end of the table and uses it to pull himself back up to his feet. Jace begins to wipe the blood from his face and pulls chunks of glass from his head. Jace begins to scream at Bobbinette Carey to get up as he approaches her. Carey begins to fight her way off of the concrete but Jace charges forward…

Joe Hoffman: BEND THE KNEE ON THE CONCRETE FLOOR!

Jace drives his boot to the back of Carey’s head which causes her skull to bounce off of the concrete floor in a disgusting manner. Jace hooks the leg and makes the cover on Bobbinette Carey as Hortega slides in for the count.

Joel Hortega: UNO

Joel Hortega: DOS

Joel Hortega: TRES!!!

NOOOOO!!!!!! KICKOUT BY CAREY!!!!!!

Joe Hoffman: BOBBINETTE CAREY KICKED OUT BEFORE THE THREE!!!! HOW THE HELL IS SHE STILL IN THIS MATCH?!?!?!

The fans explode in cheers as Hortega shoots two fingers into the air to indicate that Carey did indeed kick out before the three count. Jace sits up right in total shock that this match isn’t over. He begins to look around frantically for help to try and put Bobbinette Carey away. Anger begins to set in as Jace pulls himself up to his feet and goes after Hortega. Jace grabs a hold of the referee by the shirt and begins screaming at him. Hortega keeps holding up two fingers in Jace’s face until the LSD Champion finally snaps. Jace rears back and punches Hortega right in the face. Hortega fell to the concrete as the fans began to boo once again. Jace turns his attention back to Carey who remains on the concrete. Jace leans down and grabs a hold of Carey then starts dragging her towards the kitchen.

Joe Hoffman: Desperation is really high right now for the LSD Champion. He just knocked out the referee for this match and is leading Carey back into the kitchen. If he can’t keep her down for a three count then I think he’s going to resort to more drastic measures.

Back in the kitchen Jace rams Carey’s spine hard into the edge of one of the counters. Carey crumbles down to the concrete as Jace begins to wander around the kitchen. Jace makes his way over to the stove in the kitchen and turns the dial on the oven. The gas oven begins heating up since Jace turned the dial to 475 degrees. Jace turns back around and makes his way back towards Carey. Jace leans down and grabs a hold of Carey but she turns the table and rushes Jace’s spine into the edge of the counter hard. Carey quickly grabs a small steak knife and drives it through Jace’s left hand that’s on the counter. Jace screams bloody murder as Carey sadistically grins at her handiwork.

Joe Hoffman: I don’t even want to know what he had in mind with that oven but it backfired as Carey just drove a knife through the hand of the LSD Champion. Usually I’m totally against this level of brutality but dang it he deserves it!

Carey looks down at the shirt that Jace is wearing then begins to rip and tear it apart with her bare hands. With Jace’s chest exposed Carey begins to light up with chops to the chest as the fans Woooo with each shot. Jace manages to pull the knife from his hand and tosses it to the floor. Jace grabs a hold of Carey by the head.

Joe Hoffman: He’s biting her!

Carey screams in pain as Jace uses his teeth to dig into the open wound on her head. Jace finally pulls away from Carey then spits some blood and looks like a chunk of flesh down to the concrete. Carey falls to the floor as Jace makes his way over towards the kitchen sink while holding his bleeding hand. Jace turns on the faucet and begins to fill the sink with water. Jace turns back around and heads over towards Bobbinette Carey. Jace starts to pull Carey up to her feet but Carey counters by driving her arm upwards and hitting Jace with a secord low blow of the evening.

Joe Hoffman: I hate to say something like this and I will have to attend Church to pray for forgiveness but dammit. Hit him low again, he of all people should not be able to procreate!

Jace falls to his knees in pain as Carey staggers back up to her feet. Carey grabs a hold of Jace and begins to drag him over towards the kitchen sink. Carey yanks Jace up his feet then dunks his head down into the half filled sink. Carey holds Jace’s head under the water while his arms flail around wildly.

Joe Hoffman: She’s going to drown him!

The fans are deathly silent as Carey continues to hold Jace’s head under the water. Carey places one foot up against the counter for extra leverage to keep the stronger opponent’s head submerged. Jace begins frantically reaching and grabbing for anything that could save him in this situation. Suddenly he grips something in his hand and drives it into Carey’s foot.

Joe Hoffman: Jace just stabbed Carey in the foot with a knife!

Carey immediately lets go of Jace and falls to the concrete floor. Jace pulls his head out of the sink and gasps for air as he too falls to the concrete. Jace coughs and sputters as Carey reaches down and pulls the knife from her foot. Jace claws at the counter to pull himself up his feet as Carey begins to fight her way off of the floor. Carey makes her way up to her hands and knees again as Jace charges.

Joe Hoffman: BEND THE KNEE!

Jace leaps into the air going for the boot to the back of the head for a second time but Carey sees it coming and counters by stabbing Jace in the thigh with the knife she just pulled out of her foot.

Joe Hoffman: HOLY SHEEEEE—!!!!

Jace screams in pain and falls to the concrete floor clutching at his leg. Carey pulls herself up to her feet then notices the LSD Championship down on the floor from earlier. Carey picks up the belt and stares down at it in her hands. The fans go nuts cheering for Carey who looks up from the belt and sees that Hortega is still nowhere to be found. Carey thinks for a moment then decides to toss the LSD Championship belt back down to the floor. Carey turns her attention back over towards Jace and begins walking slowly towards him. Carey leans down and grabs a hold of the knife and pulls it from his leg. Carey holds the bloody knife into the air and stares at it with a crazy look in her eyes.

Joe Hoffman: With no referee it’s not like Carey can win the title at the moment but now what? What level is she willing to go to here now that she has Jace right where she wants him?

Carey mounts herself on top of Jace and begins screaming in his face. She raises the knife into the air and goes to drive it through his face but Jace reaches up and stops her momentum with the point of the knife inches away from his face. It’s a test of strength at this point as Carey continues to try and force the knife downwards. However, Jace is still the stronger of the two until Carey drives her knee into Jace’s groin. For the third time in this match Jace is hit low which gives Carey the chance to drive the knife directly into Jace’s ribcage.

Joe Hoffman: I don’t think I want to watch the rest of this match…

The audible gasp from the fans is heard as Carey pulls the knife from his ribcage. Jace holds his side in pain as Carey pulls herself back up to his feet. She looks around the kitchen and notices the stove. Carey grabs a hold of Jace and begins to drag him towards the stove. Slowly Hortega begins to stir and pull himself up to his feet. Carey pulls Jace up to his feet but suddenly with his last amount of energy Jace hits Carey with a right hand to the face that knocks her out.

Joe Hoffman: That was no regular punch. Jace reached into his pocket and pulled out his Hall of Fame ring. He put it on his finger and nailed Carey with a shot to the head with it!

Jace falls on his ass to the concrete floor then raises his hand into the air and kisses his Hall of Fame ring. Hortega begins to hobble his way into the kitchen as Jace pulls the HOF ring off of his finger and places it back into his pocket. Stabbed in his leg, hand, and ribcage Jace somehow pulls himself up his feet and then grabs a hold of Carey by the hair. Jace pulls the oven door open and the heat hits them both like a slap to the face. Jace begins to try and force Carey’s head into the oven but she tries to resist. Jace forces her head inside as the smell of burnt hair begins to fill the kitchen. Carey screams out as Jace continues to hold her head inside of the oven. Out of pure necessity Carey reaches back and begins to dig her fingers into the open wound on Jace’s leg. Jace screams in pain and lets go of Carey. Jace staggers back holding his leg. Carey pulls herself out of the oven while holding something in her hands. Carey rears back quickly and nails Jace with a shot to the head with the object.

Joe Hoffman: Was that a barbed wire wrapped cookie sheet with a New York Rangers logo on the back of it?! Is that what Scottywood hid in the kitchen for Carey?!?!

The shot to the head floors Jace as Carey quickly drops the burning hot cookie sheet down to the floor. Carey tends to her burning hands and then to her burnt hair. Carey grabs a hold of Jace and drags him towards the oven. Carey shoves Jace’s head into the oven just enough for his neck to be exposed. Carey grabs a hold of the oven door and just stares down at Jace.

Joe Hoffman: Oh no… she’s not going to do it, is she?! She’s going to try and end Jace’s career here in this match!

Carey screams something inaudible other than the word ‘ANGEL’ at the end of it. Carey then slams the oven door shut as hard as she possibly can right on Jace’s surgically repaired neck. Jace’s body convulses and falls to the concrete floor. Jace holds his neck in pain as Carey lets out a maniacal laugh. The fans began to rock Alcatraz with cheers for Carey but she slumps down a bit due to exhaustion and blood loss. Slowly Carey pulls herself upright as Jace begins to stir on the floor of the kitchen. He tries to pull himself off the floor but Carey charges.

Joe Hoffman: BEND THE KNEE BY THE QUEEN OF EPICNESS!!!!

Carey hits Jace with his own move which bounces his head off of the concrete floor. Carey hooks the leg and makes the cover on Jace as Hortega slides in for the count.

Joel Hortega: UNO!!!

Joel Hortega: DOS!!!

Joel Hortega: TRES!!!

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NOOOOO!!!!!!!! JACE GOT HIS SHOULDER OFF OF THE CONCRETE!!!!!!!!

Joe Hoffman: You can’t get any closer than that! Bobbinette Carey almost beat Jace Parker Davidson with his own move! Sooooo close but that’s got to be pure instinct at this point to get that shoulder up!

Carey slumps over frustrated and woozy from the loss of blood. Hortega holds up two fingers for everyone to see as the fans groan thinking Carey had won the match. Carey struggles to her feet on unsteady legs and begins to climb up onto the counters of the kitchen. Carey tries to balance herself before leaping into the air.

Joe Hoffman: EPIC ENDING INCOMING!

Carey somersaults into the air going for her finishing move one more time but Jace manages to get his knees into the air. Carey crashes and burns down to the concrete floor from the impact of falling spine first onto Jace’s knees. Jace howls in pain and grabs at the leg that Carey stabbed with the knife. Running on nothing but the pure unadulterated hate of each other Jace begins to pull himself up off of the floor on one good leg. Jace leans against the counter and begins to cough up blood as Carey refuses to stay down on the concrete. Carey gets up to one knee as Jace pulls himself away from the counter. Jace staggers forward then leaps into the air.

Joe Hoffman: BEND THE KNEE FOR A SECOND TIME!

Jace drives his boot to the back of Carey’s head and drives it down to the concrete floor. Carey’s skull bounces off the concrete as Jace falls to the floor holding his leg in pain while screaming. Jace crawls over using his arms then hooks the leg and makes the cover on Carey as Hortega slides in.

Joel Hortega: UNO!!!

Joel Hortega: DOS!!!

Joel Hortega: TRES!!!

Bryan McVay: Here is your winner… AND STILL HOW LSD CHAMPIONNNN JACEEE PARKERRR DAVIDSONNN!!!

Jace rolls off of Carey and lies on the concrete floor completely fucking spent. Hortega picks up the LSD Championship belt and places it on the floor next to Jace.

Joe Hoffman: I know that McVay is just doing his job but there was no winner here tonight in this match. No one came out victorious in this. Jace Parker Davidson BARELY survived Bobbinette Carey here tonight. This wasn’t just about the LSD Championship belt. This was about a personal war between two individuals that wasn’t going to stop until one of them could no longer function as a normal human being.

EMT’s rush into the kitchen to begin to take care of both wrestlers from the war that they just had. Cass Baumer once again appears and rushes over towards Jace’s side. Cass grabs a hold of Jace’s non-stabbed hand and grasps it tightly. Carey begins to push EMT’s away from her and staggers up to her feet.

Joe Hoffman: What is she doing?!

Carey grabs a hold of the knife off of the floor and begins to hobble her way over towards the still fallen LSD Champion. Carey raises the knife into the air looking to end Jace’s life regardless of a match or not. Cass Baumer gets up her feet and stands between Jace and Carey while extending her arms. Carey and Cass exchange words until finally EPU members flood the kitchen and apprehend Bobbinette Carey and disarm her of the knife.

Joe Hoffman: Even in defeat Carey hasn’t forgotten all that Jace has done to her. I don’t say this often but thank Heaven for the EPU.

Carey tries to fight her way from the EPU but it’s futile as Cass turns and helps Jace up off of the floor. Cass puts Jace’s arm across her shoulders and helps him hobble his way towards more medical attention as we shift away from the kitchen.

CRUSHED IN SPIRIT

We once again cut back outside and this time we see that Lee Best is no longer alone out in the prison yard. The EPU have kept everyone, this includes cameramen, from getting close to Lee minus obviously this one person.

The helicopter carrying STRONK’s body is long out of view but Lee is still staring out into the darkness….but there is a comforting arm on his shoulders.

With no light in the prison yard it is impossible to make out just who is standing next to Lee but there seems to be a shape next to the two men….clearly not a person.

The camera zooms in as much as possible but its impossible to make out the shape next to the two humans…….but the sound heard next is more than telling.

The crying roar of what could only be a bear can be heard.

An EPU agent realizing that the cameraman is zoomed smacks the camera out of his hand and the feed quickly goes dark.

STEVE HARRISON VS. CHRISTOPHER AMERICA

We cut back to Joe as it is time for our final match of the evening.

Joe Hoffman: I know this is not possible but I do feel sad for Lee? Is that possible? I mean he is clearly WRECKED and whoever that was consoling him….well I hope Lee snaps out of it. HOW is just not the same when Lee is not around causing literal Chaos.  The show continues to roll on however and it’s time for the Rumble at the Rock main event, a submission match for the High Octane Wrestling World Championship. As you can see as we take a look down at the ring, the ring crew has been hard at work, removing the ropes from the ring posts and getting us ready for what will assuredly be a brutal, technical title match.

The cameras pan toward the ringside area, the crowd on their feet at Gen Pop as they prepare for one of the most anticipated matches of the evening. The ring has been stripped of it’s ropes, leaving only the ring posts behind in an otherwise bare ring– there will be absolutely no rope breaks here tonight.

Joe Hoffman: A match like this is hard to call alone, folks, but fortunately we have a surprise for you as this seat that has been empty all night is set to be filled. Joining me at the commentary table at this time, for tonight’s main event, is the Hall of Famer himself… “Big Buff” Benny Newell.

The camera cuts back to the announce table, where Benny is just sitting down next to his pal Joe. He sets a bottle of whiskey onto one side of his seat, and a lit Jack-O-Lantern on the other, setting the ambiance for the evening.

Benny Newell: Good to be back, Joe. Now let’s pretend I haven’t watched any wrestling since that cowboy pay-per-view and catch me up on the match I’m about to call, because not only would I would blow a 1.05 on a breathalyzer right now, I’d probably blow the cop if it saved me another DUI. LET’S FUCKING GO!

Joe Hoffman: …great to have you back, Buff.

“Take the Money and Run,” By The Steve Miller Man starts to play and the curtain flies open at the entrance manufactured for Gen Pop. Steve Harrison walks out with his arms in the air, the usual smirk on his face replaced with a look of absolute determination here tonight.

Joe Hoffman: To say that there is no love lost between Steve Harrison and Christopher America is an understatement. The Highwaymen have been embroiled in a months long battle against the HOW World Champion and The Board, and tonight may very well be the last chance they will have to dethrone Christopher America.

Benny Newell: Yeah, that thing that America did a few weeks ago definitely showed his dominance and made Harrison look like a milk-drinking chump. I loved that thing that he did.

Joe Hoffman: …you couldn’t have even watched a highlight reel, Benny?

Benny Newell: I have been drinking grain alcohol slushies on a beach in Malibu and banging every lifeguard rocking at least a D cup for months, Joseph. And my in-flight wifi was down. Anyway, it doesn’t matter– America wins by pinfall in twelve minutes. There’s your spoiler.

Joe Hoffman: …Benny, it’s a submission match.

Benny Newell: Oh.

Steve Harrison enters the ring, simply climbing up the steps and walking onto the canvas. While the turnbuckles are still in place, it remains hard to take a corner, so Harrison simply chooses a side and uses it to warm up. He checks his pads, stretching out and awaiting the single biggest matchup of his career. As he does, “Remember The Name” by Fort Minor hits as the crowd erupts into a chorus of boos.

Joe Hoffman: The champion has arrived, folks. Since winning War Games, America has been nearly unstoppable in High Octane Wrestling. A victory tonight represents not just a successful title defense, but essentially a no-hitter against The Highwaymen. Steve Harrison has all the incentive in the world to dethrone the King here tonight.

Benny Newell: I may not be up to date, Joe, but you don’t need to do a lot of research to know that when Christopher America is dialed in and focused, he is one of the greatest of all time. This run has cemented that. Unless the Miracle Man wants to literally walk on water here tonight, I don’t see anything changing.

America stretches out his arm before dramatically and emphatically placing it over his heart as red, white, and blue pyros explode behind him. The HOW World Championship around his waist, he stares daggers into the soul of Steve Harrison in the ring, pointing at him as he talks some shit on his way to the ring.

Joe Hoffman: Remember, the only way this match ends is by submission. No pinfalls. No disqualifications. No way out, except to make the other man physically submit. THAT is how we will be determining who the champion is by the end of tonight’s show.

Benny Newell: IT’S MAIN EVENT TIME MOTHERFUCKERS LET’S HAVE A DRINK!

Referee Matt Boettcher holds the HOW World Championship overhead, confirming with both competitors that they’re ready to go. Once he has the go ahead, the referee calls for the bell, and this title match is officially on the books.

DING DING

The fans are nearing a boiling point, reaching through the bars in Gen Pop and near ready to riot to get just a little closer to the action. The champion and challenger stare down in the center of the ring, both men waiting for the other to strike and start this match off.

Joe Hoffman: The pressure for both of these men must be almost too much to bear.

Benny Newell: Speaking of… let me take a quick leak before this gets exciting.

Christopher America smirks at Harrison, pantomiming the belt around his waist and then giving him a mocking salute. It doesn’t appear that Steve is in the mood to talk, though, as he responds with a big right hand that shudders the champion right off the rip! America staggers backward, but Harrison keeps the right hands coming, immediately backing him toward the edge of the ring.

Joe Hoffman: That’s a longer fall than you think it is. Both of these men are going to have to be mindful of the lack of ropes here tonight.

Harrison shoots in for a tie-up, wanting to keep his momentum going, but America wriggles free and backs out, pointing at his head as the crowd boos his tactical retreat. Harrison shoots in again, but America once more backs off, inciting the crowd even further. Steve shoots in for a third time, clearly getting frustrated, but this time America counters! He pulls Harrison’s arm around behind him, tying him into a hammerlock, before twisting Harrison’s wrist up and turning it into a hammerlock sleeper hold! Steve struggles to get free, as the crowd begins booing even louder now.

Joe Hoffman: A very unhappy HOW crowd here in Alcatraz, folks– two retreats and a rest hold in the opening moments, but this crowd is hungry for BLOOD.

Benny Newell: Hey, I’m back. I miss anything other than this boring ass hammerlock?

Harrison stumbles forward, instinctively reaching for the ropes, but finding none to save him. Not wanting to blow all his stamina in the opening minutes of the match, Steve thinks quickly and spins his weight around, using the momentum to throw the champion over his shoulder with a snap mare! The crowd goes wild for the reversal, and gets even louder as Harrison begins to stomp the absolute hell out of the downed champion, laying boots directly into his head!

America rolls for the ropes, again forgetting that there aren’t any to be grabbed– Harrison dives right on him, throwing a forearm onto Chris’ throat and trying to choke the life out of him with the title on the line!

Benny Newell: Oooh shit, Milk Boy not giving a FUCK.

Joe Hoffman: It’s do or die here tonight, Benny. This could be the last opportunity granted to The Highwaymen, and Steve Harrison is the last card they have to play. You have to imagine he’ll go all out here tonight.

Chris America gets a thumb into Harrison’s eye, forcing him to release the choke as he holds his eye in pain. He climbs up to his feet, clubbing Harrison on the back with a forearm before literally grabbing him and beale tossing him toward where the ropes should be, sending Harrison careening off the apron and into the guardrail at ringside! The crowd goes fucking crazy at this sudden and unexpected escalation, and Harrison falls into a heap of his own bones as America stands with his hands on his hips, looking down from the edge of the ring.

Joe Hoffman: Oh hell, right to the concrete!

Benny Newell: See? This is why I took a piss break early. DRINK TO CTE!

For a moment, America appears to consider jumping off the apron and onto his opponent, but in the end he simply drops to his back and rolls off onto the floor. Immediately, he picks the carcass of Steve Harrison up off the concrete, holding him in tight and dropping him headfirst into the ground with an Evenflow DDT!

The crowd gasps at the impact, but America isn’t done– he holds the DDT position in place, wrapping his legs around the back of Harrison and locking in a guillotine choke, trying to end this one with television time to spare!

Benny Newell: Economy of stamina, Joe. This is how you have a long, legendary career… you don’t waste time wrestling when you can just end it early with brain damage!

Joe Hoffman: I hate to sell the challenger short, Benny, but you may be right. I can’t see him escaping this hold after taking so much damage in so little time.

Harrison flails at first, trying to find a weak spot to break out of the hold, but quickly he realizes that he’ll completely burn himself out too early. He tucks his chin the best that he can, letting his body go limp and not fighting against the hold as he builds his reserve strength.

America cinches up on the hold, trying desperately to make it stick, but Harrison pulls into overdrive. With all of his might, he lifts America up while still fully locked into the guillotine, standing to his feet and holding him in the air. America pulls back even harder, trying to pass his opponent out on his feet, but Harrison runs screaming into the turnbuckle, smashing America’s spine into the steel! He lets go of the hold, and now both men fall to the ground, hurting and tired from a battle of fortitude that took a lot out of the both of them.

Joe Hoffman: Unstoppable force meets immovable object! We’re back to square one here, and this is anyone’s match. That impact really took a lot out of America, but the battle over the guillotine is the secret stamina killer here.

Benny Newell: Two years ago, the main event was a literal deathmatch. Is this all just gonna be technical wrestling? Wake me up when someone bleeds.

The Hall of Fame announcer’s cat nap doesn’t last long– as Harrison rolls over onto his back, a huge trickle of blood has rolled from his forehead down the side of his cheek. That DDT to the floor busted him up more than initially thought.

America slowly crawls to the apron, a little less banged up than Harrison is. He pulls himself up onto the steps, turning around and noticing that Harrison is climbing to his feet as well. America charges forward, throwing a running knee into the side of the challenger’s head and sprawling him out on the concrete yet again. He drops to make a cover.

….

……

Boettcher shakes his head.

He reminds America that this is a submissions only match, and America furrows his brow before looking back down at Harrison. He hammers a whole bag full of fists into the side of his opponent’s head, before standing up from the barrage and looking around ringside for something sharp and dangerous.

Joe Hoffman: America appears to be looking for a weapon. Not shocked to see him taking a shortcut in what should be a technical wrestling match.

Benny Newell: This is why he’s the champion, Joe. The man knows how to put on a fucking show and get the job done! DRINK FOR AMERICA!

Chris lifts the apron skirt, digging around for something that will do some damage. He finds a lead pipe leftover from ring construction and seems satisfied, but as he turns around, he’s met with an elbow directly to the side of his face! Harrison grabs America by the hair, pulling him back from the apron and smashing his head against it for good measure. He lifts the champion up, hitting a rock solid suplex on the Gen Pop floor that resonates through the high ceiling! Huge impact!

America writhes on the floor, rolling toward the ring steps as Harrison climbs up onto the apron. He walks to the steps from the top, grabbing America by the head and pulling him up the rest of the way. Chris tries to fight it, but Harrison wraps his skull and catches him into a STANDING dragon sleeper! America is desperately trying to escape, but the crowd is on fire as the challenger tries to put the champion to sleep right here at ringside!

Joe Hoffman: WOW! What a submission! That’s innovation, folks.

Benny Newell: Meh. Chris America is the greatest wrestler alive right now. I heard he once submitted a live elephant.

Joe Hoffman: As opposed to a dead elephant?

Benny Newell: Shut the fuck up. You want a solo booth again?

The HOW World Champion struggles against the hold, as referee Matt Boettcher leans in to see if he’s losing consciousness. The opposite is in fact true, however– America slowly begins to turn the hold around! He flips himself to face Harrison, using all of his strength to counter the submission. He locks Harrison’s head under his own armpit, and then throws all of his weight onto the stairs.

Joe Hoffman: DDT ONTO THE STAIRS! JESUS CHRIST!

Benny Newell: A live elephant, Joe. DRINK!

The crowd is frothing at the mouth now, as a battered Christopher America rolls off the stairs, reaching around desperately for the pipe that he pulled out a moment ago. He grips it tightly into his hands as he stands to his feet, raising it high over his head and bringing it down HARD onto the knee of Steve Harrison! Harrison howls in pain, but America does it again! Steven screams, holding his knee and trying to roll away, but the champion raises the pipe yet a third time. This time, though, Harrison stops him with a boot to the midsection with his good leg, and America drops the pipe to the floor. Harrison looks hesitant, but with everything on the line, he dives for the pipe and rolls to his feet, smashing it across the side of America’s face and knocking him to the concrete!

Joe Hoffman: What a SHOT by Steve Harrison! What a momentum shift!

Benny Newell: …fucking cheater. I thought this was supposed to be a technical wrestling match? For shame, Steve Harrison. You fucking chud.

The challenger limps to his feet, hopping along to the ring steps and checking on his knee, giving it a moment to rest. Chris rolls toward the apron, trying to pull himself back up and get back into the mix.

Harrison rolls back into the ring, trying to take the action back to a place he’s a little more comfortable. Brandishing the pipe, he taunts America to get back inside and fight him like a man. Christopher is quick to oblige, and he climbs in the other side to stare down at the man who wants to take his title home with him tonight. Steve taps the pipe against his open palm, raising his eyebrows at America, and suddenly the champion makes a decision…

….and runs for his fucking life.

Chris bails out of the ring, running as quickly as he can toward the makeshift prison entranceway. Harrison escapes out after him, chasing the HOW World Champion up the “ramp” and yelling for him to come back and fight!

Joe Hoffman: The chase is on! Steve Harrison is like a man possessed!

Benny Newell: America isn’t RUNNING, he’s making a TACTICAL RETREAT. Because he’s a genius, Joe. A genius.

EPU prison guards stand in the way of the entrance, trying to keep America from abandoning the match– even with very few rules, it’s not acceptable for the champion to run away. But Benny Newell may not have been far from the truth– it looks like America had a plan all along! He turns just in time for Harrison to swing the pipe, ducking and letting him slam into the line of EPU guards keeping watch over the match! The pipe falls to the floor as Harrison is staggered backward, and America grabs him from behind, launching him high overhead with a high angle backdrop! Harrison is laid out flat, and America immediately grabs the weakened ankle and knee of his opponent, throwing on an ankle lock!

Referee Matt Boettcher sprints up the makeshift ramp, sliding in to check on Harrison as he screams out in pain. His knee has already been pieced apart with that steel pipe, and now America wrenches back with all the strength he can muster, trying to put the lid on Harrison’s coffin. Harrison desperately reaches out for something… for anything… but this match is all about having no escape!

Joe Hoffman: I think this has to be it! America has him dead to rights!

Benny Newell: GOD BLESS AMERICA BAYBEE! DRINK!

Harrison reaches out in a last second desperation move, grabbing the front of one of the EPU guards uniforms and pulling as hard as he can. He topples the armored soldier, pulling him right down onto himself and America and breaking up the hold! He quickly pulls himself away, rolling down the ramp a little and looking around for the pipe, but it’s lost in the shuffle.

The challenger shrugs.

Now it’s time for a wrestling match.

Untangling him from the EPU guard, Harrison gingerly keeps to his good leg as he lifts America up off the concrete and whips him back down toward the ring. America only makes it a few steps before he crumples back to the ground, rolling a good portion of the rest of the way. Harrison follows behind him, limping hard on his injured knee, before throwing a soccer kick into the side of America’s head that does a ton of damage but seemingly to both men.

Joe Hoffman: This is war, folks. Not your standard Chaos main event.

Benny Newell: Maybe if Chaos looked like this, HOW could get me back for more than pay-per-views.

Harrison pulls America off the ground, trying to literally caveman carry him back to the ring. America struggles to get free, throwing elbows to the back of Harrison’s head as he’s carted back toward the place where the match began— Harrison tries to shrug them off, but a sharp elbow knocks him off his step and allows the champion to drop back down, hitting Harrison with a decidedly American-Not-European Uppercut for good measure. He grabs Harrison by the head, now in control as he drags him the rest of the way toward the ring, throwing him face first into the steel turnbuckle at ringside!

America tries to slam his head a second time, but Harrison counters and stumbles away, rolling back onto the ring canvas for higher ground. America follows, looking slightly rejuvenated now.

Joe Hoffman: Usually you see huge momentum swings in these big matches, Benny, but this one has been a tight back and forth. No man has seemed to have too big an advantage at any one time.

Benny Newell: It’s all part of America’s plan, Joe. America never loses. Greatest country in the world, greatest wrestler in the world.

Harrison charges with a clothesline, but America ducks and boots him in the stomach instead. He twists him around and holds him from behind…

Joe Hoffman: FOR AMERICA 2.0! HE GOT HIM!

Benny Newell: ALL PART OF THE PLAN, JOE!!!! DRINK!!!!

America nails his finishing move out of nowhere, immediately dropping for the cover out of pure instinct, but there are no pinfalls in this match! The champion almost looks ill as he realizes his mistake, and he hops up to his feet on pure adrenaline. He shoves Boettcher, beginning to show his true colors now as he takes his moment of dumb out on the referee. Boettcher shoves America back, though, and now the two are jawing off in the middle of the ring!

America looks ready to snap, but before he can act, Harrison is on his feet and lunging for the champion! He grabs him into a chicken wing suplex position from behind, but instead of suplexing him, he wraps his legs around the body of America, vining him up. He’s got it locked in! HE’S GOT IT LOCKED!

Joe Hoffman: IT’S A HARRICLE! HE MADE IT A SUBMISSION HOLD! HOLY SHIT!

Benny Newell: What? WHAT?! NO! NO NO NO NO NO! THIS IS ILLEGAL! CALL AN ATTORNEY RIGHT AWAY!

America’s eyes grow wide… he knows that he has nowhere to go and there’s no escape! The champion begins frantically flailing his body, trying to escape the hold, but it’s slowly wearing him down the harder he fights. The crowd is getting louder and louder now, as the fans in attendance realize that they are literally seeing history being made.

Joe Hoffman: AMERICA IS GOING LIMP! IT’S OVER! CALL FOR THE BELL!

Benny Newell: COMMUNISM! SOCIALISM! CALL THE GODDAMNED POPE THIS IS FUCKING BULLSHIT!

The champion is fucking done, hardly an ounce of energy left in him as Boettcher leans in to check and see if he quits. America has no options left, and does the only thing he can think to do…

…he throws his entire body weight into Boettcher!

The collective pile of Harrison and America collapses onto the referee, who goes down with both of them into the middle of the ring. America has entirely passed out in the hold, but he’s now laying on top of Boettcher, who can’t escape or see that he’s unconscious! Harrison desperately latches on to the hold, unsure of how to save what is clearly his World Championship winning moment, but eventually he has no choice.

He has to release the hold.

He dumps America off to one side, shaking his head as he drops to his good knee, trying to get some rest. He had it. The moment was in his grasp, and America stole it by taking down the referee. He grits his teeth and tightens his fists, more determined than ever to end this. Steve Harrison spins around, looking at the unconscious Christopher America and quickly shaking Boettcher awake.

The challenger kicks America in the ribs, telling him to get the fuck up and finish it. America isn’t moving– he’s hard out cold, and not getting up anytime soon. Harrison yanks the body of his opponent up into a seated stance, lining back up to where the ropes would be and firing off with ENLIGHTENMENT to finish the job…

…but his knee gives out!

Joe Hoffman: NO! HIS KNEE! America wasn’t working the knee for the ankle lock…

Benny Newell: …HE WAS WORKING IT FOR THE KNEE TRIGGER! GENIUS! FUCKING GENIUS!

…and maybe Benny isn’t wrong.

As soon as Harrison’s knee buckles, America stops playing possum. The extra thirty seconds he pretended to be asleep after finding consciousness gave him time to rest, and he pops up to his feet and grabs Harrison in a flurry, throwing him overhead and onto his shoulders.

Joe Hoffman: TORTURE RACK! HE’S GOT THE TORTURE RACK!

Benny Newell: SHHHH IT’S CALLED ENHANCED INTERROGATION TECHNIQUES!

For extra measure, America tweaks the knee of Steve Harrison as he ragdolls him upon his massive shoulders. The crowd is booing like crazy as Harrison’s body finally gives out– there’s no EPU, referee, or ropes in sight, and if America keeps putting on the pressure, he’ll snap his fucking knee in two.

Joe Hoffman: …Boettcher is asking if he submits…

Benny Newell: AND HE FUCKING DOES! IT’s OVER! AMERICA RETAINS! AMERICA RETAINS!

Again, Benny isn’t wrong!

DING DING DING

As soon as the bell rings, America’s body collapses into the middle of the ring, dumping Harrison as well. Call it luck or call it strategy, but Christopher America has managed to retain his HOW World Championship by an absolute cunt hair to end Rumble at the Rock.

Bryan McVay: Here is your winner by submission, and STILL HOW WORLD CHAMPIONNNNNNN… CHRISTOPHER… AAAAAAAMERRRRRICAAAAAA!

Referee Matt Boettcher brings him the HOW World Championship, but both competitors in tonight’s match are sprawled out in a heap. Exhausted. Battered. Beaten down.

Rumble at the Rock comes to an end as the fans in the cells begin tossing everything not nailed down out of the cells and down towards the ring.

We get a final shot of America hugging the World Championship as trash rains down all around him.

BONUS SCENES FROM THE TITANIC

It is about 2am and we cut to a boat that is still docked at Alcatraz Island. We cut to the masters cabin of what is clearly a large yacht and as we do we see an empty bottle of Eagle Rare roll across the floor.

The cameraman, who was called into duty, slowly turns the corner and he sees a very drunk Lee Best sitting on the edge of his bed. He looks up and sees the cameraman and motions of the man to come closer.

Lee Best: Words. I have MOAR words dammit. Get over here you fucking poor.

The cameraman inches closer to Lee and stops as Lee looks up at the man and smiles.

Lee Best: What a complete shit show we could have had tonight but NOOOOOO those fucking poors stepped up and made it. FOR AMERICA!!!!

Lee starts laughing as he leans over and grabs a small bag on the dresser next to his bed and he immediately pulls two gummies from the bag and swallows quickly and washes it down with a shot from a second bottle of Eagle Rare that he just opened.

Lee Best: THE BEST FOOD GROUP FUCK THE WORLD!!!!!

The GOD of HOW falls backwards on the bed and looks up at the ceiling…which is clearly spinning for the man.

He quickly sits back up.

Lee Best: FUCK that shit. Holy fuck. Cameraman…words…I got fucking words.

Lee is on the cusp of speaking in cursive and knows he has to get out what he needs to.

Lee Best: STRONK is gone but America and Jace they fucking stepped up….and its ICONIC time baby!!! You know what that means……MY MATCHES….FUCK YOUR FEELINGS!!!

Lee staggers up to his feet and walks over to a nearby table and grabs a few double stuffed Oreos from a bag. He rips the end off two of them and merges three Oreo’s into one. He holds his creation up to the cameraman and gives him a big fist pump.

Lee Best: FUCK YOU….MY SON WOULD BE PROUD!!!!

Lee drops the Oreo and he knows not to bend over and pick it up or else fall on his face.

Lee Best: Ok…..the iceberg just hit the Titanic…..NEWS….LETS BREAK SOME NEWS….ICONIC MATCHES!!!! RUN THE GRAPHIC MONKEY IN THE TRUCK!!!

A screenshot of a excel workbook is shown on the screen listing several matches in a file clearly called MATCH MATRIX.

  • #3 STEVE HARRISON VS. # 3 CONOR FUSE
  • #LPW STEVE SOLEX VS. #PEACHSTATEWRESTLING JACE PARKER DAVIDSON

And then a final graphic is shown on the screen just as we hear Lee hit the floor….and begins snoring.

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